Welcome back to Fat Girls Dating Tips, where I hand out dating advice despite not actually dating myself. Think of me as the friend who sits on the couch with snacks, providing running commentary on your love life. Today’s topic? First dates. Specifically, why inviting someone over for “Netflix and Chill” doesn’t count as a real date unless your goal is to look like the human version of a red flag.
First dates matter. They set the tone for everything that comes after. So, if your big romantic move is suggesting your couch and whatever’s trending on Netflix, it might be time for a rethink. Let’s talk about what first dates should (and shouldn’t) look like.
Why “Netflix and Chill” is Lazy Dating
Here’s the problem: inviting someone over to “watch a movie” right away skips all the important first-date steps like actually talking, getting to know each other, and, you know, not accidentally falling asleep halfway through a series.
Translation in Dating Language
“Netflix and Chill” as a first date says:
- “I didn’t put in any effort.”
- “I’m not interested in making you feel special.”
- “I may or may not own real furniture.”
That’s not exactly the vibe you want to send when you’re trying to impress someone new.
The Power of Effort
First dates don’t have to be fancy or expensive, but they do need to show effort. A little planning says you care enough to try. It’s not about the activity itself. It’s about showing you value the other person’s time.
Examples That Work
- Meeting at a coffee shop.
- Going for ice cream or dessert.
- A walk in the park or by the water.
- A casual dinner spot where you can actually talk.
Simple, thoughtful plans go a long way. Effort doesn’t need a big budget. It needs intention.
Conversation Beats Entertainment
The whole point of a first date is to see if you click. That means talking, not zoning out in front of a screen. Conversation builds connection, helps you find common ground, and lets you figure out if this person is worth date number two.
Pro Tip
Choose a first date setting where talking is natural. Loud bars or dark movie theaters make connection harder. Coffee shops, casual restaurants, or even a bookstore date are better choices.
Don’t Overcomplicate It
One of the biggest mistakes people make is overthinking. A first date doesn’t need to be a five-star dinner or an elaborate adventure. In fact, keeping it low-pressure makes it easier for both people to relax.
Think Simple and Fun
- Mini golf.
- A food truck meet-up.
- A trivia night.
- Local farmers market stroll.
The simpler the plan, the easier it is to focus on each other.
Respect and Safety Come First
Another reason “Netflix and Chill” is a bad first date idea? Safety. Inviting someone to your home, or going to theirs before you know them well can feel unsafe or rushed. First dates are about comfort, not pressure. A neutral, public place makes both people feel secure and respected.
Red Flags to Avoid on First Dates
Since we’re talking about what not to do, let’s go over a few red flags that scream “this is not going to work.”
The Warning Signs
- Showing up late without a text.
- Talking only about yourself.
- Constantly checking your phone.
- Oversharing about your ex.
None of these say “second date material.” If you recognize yourself here, consider this your sign to level up.
Why Effort Matters More Than Money
Some people think dating is all about spending big to impress. Wrong. What people really want is to feel like you care enough to put thought into the experience. A five-dollar coffee date with real conversation beats a fancy dinner with someone glued to their phone.
Final Swipe-Worthy Advice
First dates set the tone. If your idea of romance is pulling up Netflix and hoping for the best, you’re skipping all the important parts of building a connection. Show effort, choose somewhere you can actually talk, and keep it simple but thoughtful.
So, from this fat girl who doesn’t even date, you need to put away the remote, step away from the couch, and remember that a real first date doesn’t need surround sound to be memorable.
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