While driving with my 16-year-old daughter Celeste, our casual chat took a serious turn, touching on hot-button issues like race, immigration, and safety in the U.S. Recognizing the importance of her young yet mature outlook, we shifted gears into a full-blown interview. Her keen observations provide a rare glimpse into how a teenager—also a college student—views the challenging world around her.
Safety in the United States
Angela: You have to learn what the safe things to do and the safe places to go are when you go out in this world.
Celeste: There are no safe or non-safe things to do. Because no matter what you’re doing now, it’s not safe anywhere.
Angela: There has to be somewhere that’s safe. I mean, you’re in the United States. The greatest country in the world. Isn’t it?
Celeste: To be honest. There are not very many people who get along in the United States anymore. It’s not even about money or social class because even people with or without money are still committing crimes, but it’s really just about the fact that people don’t have any morals anymore.
The Moral Issue
Angela: Why do you think that is? Why do you think people don’t have morals anymore?
Celeste: Well, a lot of the younger kids are being introduced to like Rap and stuff that which is literally talking about gangs and murder. So, it makes them want to go into gangs without realizing everything that happens to them. Then there are the older kids who didn’t have parents for their formative years. And between that and the way that the world views things so normally now like shootings and everything, they think that they can get away with bad things. Like that one car on the news a couple weeks ago where the teens smashed into the other car and then hit that dad on the bike, and they were laughing about it. They killed him and laughed about it.
Angela: Oh yeah, that’s terrible. So you think that kids today just don’t have a moral conscience. They don’t care.
Celeste: They have no empathy. They don’t realize that people are human beings. They don’t find it sad whenever people die, so….
Angela: So why do you think that is? People used to have empathy. They cared about other people. So, what do you think majorly caused a huge change in, you know, adolescents, teenagers growing up, not caring?
Neighbors
Celeste: Back when you were little, or when your parents were little, people could send their kids to the grocery store at the age of like six when the store was down the road. And their neighbors would make sure nothing would happen to them. But now so many people don’t even say hi to their neighbors or even make it known that. They live right next to people and never even know who they are at all.
Angela: Yes, that is true.
Celeste: They just kind of ignore the fact that other people exist at all. And they don’t build bonds. People don’t build bonds like they used to. They have no problems stabbing people in the back or talking badly about them.
Angela: That’s true. I mean, when I was growing up, we cared about people and we knew all of our neighbors.
Celeste: I know, you’ve gone around your hometown city a million times and been able to point out which house certain people lived in, or where you played or knew people. Even if it wasn’t in the same neighborhood that you lived in. People got to know other people back then.
Angela: Yes. And today I don’t even know any of our neighbors other than your friends who live in the neighborhood.
Celeste: The only people I’ve known are people that I go to school with and have hung out with directly.
Angela: So, what do you think it’s going to take to change the world? To make people understand how things are.
Celeste: Well, you can’t change a world that doesn’t want to change.
Angela: Do you think nobody wants to change?
Celeste: I’m sure there’s people out there who do. But there’s a lot of people who don’t. They think that that’s the only way to live and get their way. They’ve grown up on being told that they should assert dominance in everything you do. Instead of being like, hey, maybe I’m wrong and I should back down. There are some people who have been in arguments and stuff over stupid things and just gotten so mad that they shoot the other person just so that they can win the argument.
Angela: Yeah, I suppose that’s true.
Violence
Celeste: And I’m not saying that stuff wasn’t bad before. Back in like the 90s and stuff when you were younger. I wouldn’t say that things weren’t tough at times. I would say they’re a lot different now. It’s not just like gang-on-gang violence, it’s gangs versus everyone around them, and everyone else versus everyone. It’s, you don’t even have to make anyone mad anymore. Violence just happens as a normal thing now.
Angela: I mean, is it just the gangs? Is it really even just the gangs anymore? I mean, it’s regular people too now. You know, you just never know.
Celeste: But when I say gangs now, it’s not specifically like big groups like Bloods, Crips, and stuff it’s like just people that are doing their own things but there’s always a little group behind them cheering them on. It used to be that people who were like, murderers and stuff would get terrible punishments. And now there’s people out there who are like stabbing people and stuff and getting like 10 years in prison. And then getting put right back out on the streets.
They’re getting advantages just because they write music or they’re getting bonds that are getting paid on the first day.
Angela: Yes, that’s true.
Celeste: And it doesn’t help that drugs and stuff are so common.
Angela: So, what do you think about that? The whole situation with drugs and all that?
Celeste: I mean, I think it’s good for anyone who’s taking time to get off of them, but it affects your mental state bad. Well, like all of it, it affects them badly, but not just on the addictive part it. Drugs take people into a false reality of what the World is.
Angela: Yes, you do have a good point on that. Do you think there’s a difference in different types of drugs that people are doing.
Celeste: No matter what you’re doing, it can affect people differently.
Angela: That’s true.
Celeste: It’s like drinking. Some people, whenever they drink become highly angry and abusive I guess. And other people can go out and drink and have a good time. But in the end, they’re both doing wrong because they’re still going out there, losing control of their body. Blacking out, driving while they don’t know what’s going on. Getting themselves into situations with people that they might not otherwise want to be around. The crime and rape charges are higher percentages with messed up and drunk people. I’m not saying that drinking gives anyone a reason to do anything, but whenever you’re drunk, you don’t. You don’t…
Angela: Have any control of what you’re doing?
Celeste: Well, you know. Once you black out, you don’t know what’s going on after that. Until people tell you the next day. And that’s if you make it to the next day and if they even tell you. Some people just never know. They keep doing it. And then that’s also how people get drugged with other stuff too? Like the date rape drugs.
Angela: Yeah, that’s true.
Black Lives Matter
Celeste: I mean also…other than drugs and violence, The United States is just not united anymore. People get mad at each other just for things that can’t be helped, like race.
Angela: So what do you Think about issues about race, like people that are fussing and saying they don’t like Black Lives Matter or people saying that they’re terrorists and all of that. What do you think about all that? Start with race. What do you think about that? I mean, you are biracial, so. How does it make you feel? When you hear Black Lives Matter, what do you think of that organization?
Celeste: I don’t really think of it as an organization. I don’t pay attention to all of those. To be honest, I think of black lives matters as all lives matter. Black Lives Matter just means that you just need to take time to realize how some others are being treated.
Angela: Yes. And I think that’s what Black lives matters whole thing is not saying that only Black Lives Matter. They’re saying take a moment and realize that black lives matter too.
Celeste: Obviously, living in a mainly white area with a bunch of people who may have never been out of this small town. Black people are a big topic of bad, racist jokes. Like a lot of black jokes. And a lot of white people saying the N word around me and me having to tell them, don’t say that. Don’t. Because I don’t. I don’t hang around with people like that. Like I won’t be friends with people, if they can’t have decent morals and not be like that.
Angela: So what do you what do you think about people saying the N word, even black people saying it?
Celeste: I think that everyone should be uncomfortable hearing it, right? I don’t think because you’re black you should want to use those words. It was used towards our ancestors in a very degrading way, and it’s still used as a very degrading term. I’ve heard a lot of black people say the first time they were ever called the N word and it was hurtful, was by another black person.
Angela: Ohh really?
Celeste: So, I just, I don’t think that anyone should say it no matter what color they are. And it’s just not even like a word that sounds natural in a sentence.
Angela: So, when you hear white people say it and you’ve had white friends who have used that word. How does it make you feel when you hear somebody that you actually think, oh, that’s my friend but then you hear them say the N word.
Celeste: I don’t know how to explain it. It’s kind of more like a secondhand embarrassment feeling. It just kind of, well it makes you like cringe and like makes you…
Angela: Does it make you feel embarrassed of who you are or who they are?
Celeste: It doesn’t make me feel embarrassed about who I am or who they are. It’s just the fact that they’re using the word. And people obviously know they shouldn’t because there’s been people who say it to friends outside of me. And then will tell me they won’t say it in front of me. If they know they shouldn’t say it in front of me, then they know they shouldn’t be saying it.
Angela: No, that’s true. They definitely shouldn’t be.
Celeste: And people are constantly making fun of my hair in this small-town area. When everywhere else, where there might be a larger black population, people might be complementing it. Instead, they’re saying, wow, look how big your hair is? It looks like I couldn’t even run my fingers through it. And things like that and it’s like, that’s just embarrassing to someone like me, and that’s what keeps a lot of people from wearing their natural hair. Of course, there’s people out there who think curls are really pretty.
But then there’s other people who will say they think someone’s natural hair or braids are pretty and then continue to say every backhanded compliment about it possible. I don’t know, and another thing is clothing. If a white person were to dress down for the day like in comfortable clothes because they were cleaning at home or something and needed to run to the store, people would be like, oh, she looks cute or she must be a busy mom or something cleaning the house. But then if it’s a black person, they’re like, they probably think things like, oh, she must be homeless. Oh, she must be trying to steal. Don’t go near her.
Angela: So, do you see that type of behavior from people when you go out to places like the mall, do you ever feel like people are judging you because of your race? Or have you ever had been made to feel like that when you’ve gone out in public? Can you tell me about it? Where have you been? Where did you feel like you were judged for race?
Celeste: Like in class, if you’re talking about slavery and you’re the only black kid in the class. It’s like everyone in the class turns around and looks at you. And it’s like. I don’t know. Why are they looking at me just because I’m black? It wasn’t me back in slavery times. Or like walking around the mall. Whenever you’re the only black person in a group, or the only two black people. It’s kind of like very often, like if I’m at the mall with a friend of mine who is black and stuff and we’re in a group filled with white people in the mall, my friend is most likely going to make a joke and we feel like we’re probably getting a lot of stares because we’re the only two black people in the mall. And of course, because my friend is a bigger black guy, he stands out more than someone like I would because I’m small, and it feels like people stare because of our race. But it’s definitely even worse whenever I have my braids in my hair.
Angela: Ohh is it?
Celeste: If my hair is not straightened and stuff like a white person’s hair might be, and I’m wearing braids, a lot of the time, people around here find braids ugly or they think braids are too ghetto. But to black people, it’s a protective style for their hair to let it grow healthy.
Angela: Right. And it looks really beautiful. Just so you know that.
Celeste: Like I’ve had a lot of friends at school tell me that at first they didn’t like my braids but then the braids kind of grew on them and they got used to them. Like, you shouldn’t have to have something like natural hair or braids grow on you to be okay with something like that. You should just realize that hey, it’s, it’s a normal thing.
LGBTQ
Angela: What about your thoughts, as a Christian teen when it comes to the whole conversation of gender and especially transgender students and gay and you know, the entire LGBTQ community. What do you think about all of that?
Celeste: Honestly, I believe, just let people be themselves. It doesn’t affect you. At any point it doesn’t affect you unless you are the one who is in a gay relationship or you’re the one who is transgender.
Angela: What about gay marriage?
Celeste: If someone were to like, come up to you and try and hit on you. All you have to do is tell them that you’re not gay. Like it’s not that hard. I think most people would get to know beforehand if the person is gay or not before they would ever hit on them. As for gay marriage, people should have the right to marry who they want to marry. Someone else’s marriage doesn’t affect anyone else’s life.
Angela: We’ve heard people talking about how they can’t stand to see gay people kiss and show affection in public.. And you know, straight people do that too. So, what are your thoughts on that? If you see a gay couple walking down the street holding hands or even kissing, do you think there’s something wrong with that? They’re happy. They’re in love. They’re on a date. Is it any different with them than it would be, say, if you went out with a guy and you’re holding hands?
Celeste: A lot of people for some reason find the whole concept weird because they don’t understand exactly how it works.
Angela: How love works?
Celeste: No. they don’t understand how being gay works. It makes them (some of the straight people I guess) feel weirded out knowing that the same 2 genders are together and do the same things that heterosexual couples do.
Angela: So, what do you think about transgender, especially transgender youth? Because it seems to be a huge topic in the news and quite a few people are fussing about transgender bathrooms and sports and everything else.
Celeste: Yeah, I don’t think little kids should even be introduced to things like gay or trans until they’re old enough to comprehend life. There are so many elementary school kids that are being introduced to it now, and it’s just confusing. It’s already a confusing topic for adults or older teens, let alone as a small child who doesn’t even know how to comprehend their own emotions or know how to socialize with people yet.
It’s not something they need to introduce to little kids like pre-school to ages 10 or 11. It shouldn’t be something that is discussed even in like, Disney movies and stuff. But that’s just like even regular straight couple relationships and stuff in general. I don’t think any of it should be introduced to kids.
Angela: I agree with that.
Celeste: It gets them introduced to things that they shouldn’t know about at younger ages, and I get that they’re going to go out in the public and see people. I think there’s a difference between introducing kids to it personally or just having them see like a kid in their class with gay parents. I think people should just be telling them, hey, it doesn’t make them any different but there is no reason to go into major detail about what gay or straight is until the kid is older and can understand fully.
Angela: Right.
Celeste: Like making it known that there are differences in people sure, but they don’t need to force everything on them and like tell them too much when they’re too young to really understand. Kids go through enough without having to worry about relationships or sexual things when they’re little.
Immigration
Angela: What about immigration? That’s a huge topic right now.
Celeste: I guess that. People are scared of immigrants in the United States for some reason, but there is no reason to be. We kind of told people that they could come here as a safe place to stay and as a safe place to have children and that being in the United States could help make sure their children are safe.
There are people coming here from other countries because they’re out of work and because they want their children to live in a place that, a place that protects them, right?
But now it’s so backwards because people are trying to kick out anyone of any other race. People have made fun of like China and stuff because of coronavirus. And people have tried to tell Mexicans to build a wall. And it’s like, are they not people too? I don’t see what makes them any different besides the place that they are originally from. They might have different cultural standpoints, but it doesn’t mean that they’re bad people.
Angela: So as an American citizen, would you have a problem living in a neighborhood where Immigrants moved in next door?
Celeste: To be honest, America needs more diversity. Too many people are used to America being mostly white. Well, mostly white and black. That no matter what other race comes in? It’s just like people can’t keep their rude words to themselves. You go to a nail salon and so many of the people come out making fun of the way that they talk and that gets on my nerves. I don’t think people should imitate other people’s accents and stuff just because they’re a different race or treat them differently or act like they have to have lower quality jobs.
Like, a lot of the Mexicans in the United States do construction. I don’t know. They come here and there’s only certain jobs they can get because of where they’re from but so many immigrants still work harder than the citizens who were doing construction. And the citizens should be the ones that are working harder to make sure that things are better. I mean like, people who are original citizens of the United States.
They should be working harder than the people who are immigrants to make sure things are still safe and that everyone’s getting along. People shouldn’t have to come over to the country thinking they’re going to be safe and thinking they aren’t going to be judged and stuff and then having to work harder to even get people to realize that there’s nothing to worry about with them.
And I don’t think that people should have to prove themselves to people that they are good people for years, on top of years.
Just for people In the United States to say hey, you had a kid here 21 years ago and you both need to leave. And that’s what they’re trying to do is kick out people and their kids when this is all they’ve known since they were younger people. They’ve grown up in America and some of those kids probably didn’t even know that they were immigrants.
A lot of kids grow up in America and never know their families language because a lot of families try and hide that they’re not from America because there are some people that don’t want them here. Then they try to deport a family who has kids who can’t even communicate with they get sent back to a country they don’t even know. It’s not right.
Angela: Knowing right. Do you think that we could even have America as we know it without immigrants here? Would it be as functional as is? I mean, do you think that immigrants, when they come over, that they contribute to our society in a great way?
Celeste: I don’t think America would be even considered the United States without other races and ethnicities. To be honest, a lot of immigrants and people of other races work 100 times harder to get to the places they are in life than a white person.
Angela: Yeah, I agree.
Celeste: I mean for someone of color to own their own business, they’re going to have to do a lot more work to get it out there. And a lot more work to prove themselves of being dependable than a white person who just has a lot of money and it’s like, hey, I’m going to buy this business. And hope it goes well. And black people have to, and like other races in general, they have to dress nice all the time in order for them not to get judged.
While white people can go out in whatever they want and just be considered in comfortable clothes or dressed like they’re feeling a little lazy for the day or like they just need to do household shopping.
It’s not about clothing though. This country has been so separated, and not just when slavery was happening. I mean we’ve had select few times that The United States has actually come together. And I think the early 2000s up until 2016 I would say it was doing all right. I didn’t hear much about anything really like, racism wise. I’m not saying it wasn’t as bad, but it’s definitely worse now than it was then.
Angela: I agree.
The World is a Scary Place
Celeste: And especially crime rates. I would definitely say it’s gone up now more than it ever has been before.
Angela: Yes, it’s becoming a scary country sometimes.
Celeste: I mean, teenagers shouldn’t worry about having to go out on the road and being stopped by a police officer because they’re a different color. They shouldn’t have to worry about walking through a store or driving or walking to school or riding a bike.
Angela: Yeah, I agree. What do you think about homelessness? We see so many people on the streets begging for money and. What do you think about the homeless population, I know you’re only 16, but do you think that there’s a way that the United States could really actually do something to help the homeless?
Celeste: It depends on where they are. To be honest, it’s all because a lot of homeless people purposely put themselves in the situation. So, they have a problem. But they don’t want to solve it. A lot of people are on the streets because of drugs, and they still don’t want to solve them. You can’t change someone that doesn’t want to be changed.
Angela: Right.
Celeste: But there are a lot of homeless people out there who were on drugs and stuff but are no longer on drugs and just need a place to go, but from where they’ve been out there for so long, they look like they are still on drugs. Or there’s people who are homeless because they have mental disorders and can’t physically take care of themselves. Like this woman who used to wander around the streets in my city. She had bad mental problems and it seemed like a lot of people just didn’t care.
Angela: Yeah, but they finally got her off the street into a hospital where she got the help she needed.
Celeste: It took them years to get her there. I don’t think people should have to be put in those situations. People pay taxes every year, but it goes to richer people. I mean, if everyone’s paying taxes, it should go towards the people who need it the most. Not towards the people who are already billionaires.
Public Education, Or a Lack Thereof
Angela: That is true. What do you think about our educational system? You want to be a teacher when you finish college. So, what do you think about the public education system? You went to public school and then you were also home schooled and now you’re in college, so what do you think about the public school system?
Celeste: The fact that I left public school to be homeschooled is a good enough example of how bad public schools are now. Being a teacher is scary now. These students have flipped on teachers. And there’s students who flip on other students, principals, teachers. There’s too much gun violence. There is no reason classrooms should be putting gun proof rooms inside of the classrooms.
Angela: That is true. I mean when I was growing up, we worried about fist fights. You never saw somebody bring a gun or a knife to school. We didn’t have those issues when I was in high school all the way through high school. I graduated in 1989. So when it comes to that stuff, kids did not disrespect teachers back then. Sure, there were a few kids who may have every once in a while, but it wasn’t a general thing every day and in the classroom. For the most part, kids were respectful.
What do you think changed, like from the time I was in school up until now in the 2020’s where kids are so disrespectful to teachers and seem to care less about what happens? What do you think changed with kids to have this degree of chaos in the classroom? And can it be changed? Do you think there’s any way that they could change it and make the schools better?
Celeste: The way kids are at school today, it’s very chaotic. They’re very disrespectful of their teachers.
Angela: It’s like a lot of the kids just don’t even care what the teachers say. I mean we can see on social media and in the news that kids not only verbally say things that are rude to the teachers, but teachers are physically attacked now, and they have to worry about being physically attacked or shot or anything.
Celeste: It’s not that uncommon to see kids like that. They’re developing unbelievably bad mental disorders at a younger age now. And it’s not known to adults. Doctors do not prescribe people the things they need at a young age. There’s the kids who are being introduced to gun violence and stuff at a young age and adults are not realizing that where they’re heading is wrong. I think the kids might know it’s wrong but whenever you get a kid that you’ve introduced terrible things to so young it becomes something that they want to do.
The bad things become more of like a temptation. Like kids aren’t being tempted to eat candy and stuff or tempted to push a button that someone has said don’t not to touch. It’s more like, hey, don’t shoot your teacher. Hey, don’t shoot other students. And that’s not even something that kids should have to be told not to do at an early age. But it is and there’s like 3rd graders going to class shooting them and like second graders and 1st graders.
Angela: So, what do you think can stop that or change it? Make it better?
Celeste: Well, one, parents need to be real. There are so many families now where the parents are on drugs and don’t pay attention to their kids at all. Or they leave them to fend for themselves. Those things are making kids depressed at a young age, and they don’t know how to handle it.
School Fears
Angela: What does it feel like for a teenager to go to school today when you know that there’s always that, you know that risk of somebody coming to school with a gun. Is it a scary thing or do kids even think about it?
Celeste: For me, I have anxiety, so if I hear any type of loud thing I automatically assume something’s going wrong. If I hear some type of weird noise, I worry. Like even in college, I could hear a bang on the top floor above me and I think something’s going wrong, so I’m constantly in a cautious state of mind to make sure that whenever I walk into a room, I immediately scan every exit in the room. Like every plan that would happen if there was someone to the left of me who had a gun, where I would go or where I would hide. How I would get out of there. How I’d duck or would I go to the left, or would I go to the right to get out somehow. And I scan every window in the room, and even every trash can.
Angela: You literally do this every time that you go into a classroom?
Celeste: Yeah, even if it’s the same room over and over. I do it every time.
Angela: That’s scary to me. As a parent, hearing that. You know, that is terrifying to know that my child or any other child has to think about that sort of thing when they walk into a classroom. Because walking into a classroom I think that a student at any age, whether they’re kindergartener or in college like you, the only thing they should be thinking about is getting through the day and getting their homework done or what they’re going to learn in class or who they’re going to hang out with at lunch or what they’re going to do after school.
But walking in and doing what you just said you have to do, like scanning the room and thinking about your escape every time you go into a classroom. I never realized that kids had to think about those things. And that is heartbreaking. Yeah, I do that in public because I’ve always been vigilant of muggers, but I didn’t realize that kids were having to do it at school. School is supposed to be a safe space for kids.
Know Your Kids
Celeste: You can’t do anything without being unsafe. So that’s why my goal in life is just to live as much as I can at a young age without doing wrong morally. Because you don’t know what’s going to happen at any point. Especially not now. Even my own children, if they’re like me personally, I would love them and I would let them go out and be themselves. If they’re not like me, though, like if I know they’re going to do wrong. I mean, people know their kids and they know whether they’re out there drinking or not whether they want to believe it, or not.
Angela: I don’t understand the parents who don’t know their kids are doing things.
Celeste: I mean, they do know though. You can’t be that blind to not smell the vapes or not smell weed in your house. Or notice that alcohol is going missing or notice alcohol hidden in bushes somewhere outside of your house.
Angela: I think some parents, unfortunately, are blind. Some don’t see things because they don’t pay attention.
Celeste: Now kids like that, I believe they would need a bit more guidance before going out, yeah. Like, I have a good friend group. My closest friends also do the same things as me and like to plan ways out of rooms so.
Angela: Do they do? You’ve talked about that with them.
Celeste: One of my closest friends has the same anxiety as me. She does that in every room she goes into. I mean, even just going to her house to spend the night, every time, we’ve talked about what if there was an intruder. Which door would we go out of? Where would we hide? Where would we run?
Angela: Yes. I think about that at our house. I’m like, I just hope you go out the window, hold on to the ledge, drop down, and run as fast as you can up the street!
Celeste: Yes. Nowhere is safe in our world anymore. We need to find a way to change that. I just don’t know if we ever will.
Angela: Thanks for talking to me, Celeste.
Today’s teens unfortunately see a major decline in moral values and community ties. The changing landscape of human interaction influenced by technology and societal shifts has seemingly resulted in a decline in empathy and moral responsibility. This presents not just a challenge but an imperative reason for all of us to work together to restore a sense of community and ethical grounding for the generations to come. It’s past time to do what’s right to teach our children to have empathy and understanding towards others. Stop teaching hatred. Teach kindness. Teach love. Change the world.
